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Ordinance 64 – Anchorage Alaska

I really think that John Aronno of The Alaska Commons does a great job of writing about the issues in regard to Ordinance 64.  This is about so much more than equal rights – it is about basic human regard for others and I continue to be amazed at the intolerance of people in general and the fear that drives hateful words.

Please read the latest installation about the efforts to extend equal rights protections in Anchorage, Alaska… it is well worth the read.

We the Future of Alaska, in Solidarity

Sarah Palin Resigns…

I would like to be clear that I do not approve of the media attacks on Palin’s family. While politicians put themselves out there and are open to criticism, families should be off limits.

I do not care for her, but that is because I have had the opportunity to meet her in person, hear her speak on topics that are important to me, and push forward her agenda items without (in my opinion) seriously considering the input from commissions that she has appointed to study hot  issues when their findings have been contrary to her established views. There has been an appearance of “transparency” but I do not believe that this is a reality.

I do not agree with her on a number of issues. There is that gut feeling you may have about others, when there is something just not “right”.  My gut tells me that I cannot trust her and do not feel that she has followed through on her promises/espoused “not politics as usual” stance. I did not vote for her because of this feeling when she was running for governor.

Alaska will be better served with Gov. Palin out of the spotlight and working outside of government on issues that are important to her.

Post edit – 07/05/09 A great link to the Alaska Commons about the press coverage of this news.

Post edit – 07/21/09 – transcript of resignation press conference.

Updates… Ordinance 64

Please check out the post from John Aronno of  The Alaska Commons.

John provides an update on Ordinance 64 and provides links to an editorial and opinion piece featured in the Northern Light. Both are good reads.

Death and those who are left behind…

From the movie Seven Pounds(1)

911 Operator: 911 emergency…

Ben Thomas: I need an ambulance.

911 Operator: I have you at 9212 West Third Street in Los Angeles.

Ben Thomas: That’s room number 2.

911 Operator: What’s the emergency?

Ben Thomas: There’s been a suicide.

911 Operator: Who’s the victim?

Ben Thomas: I am.

I watched a movie last night that brought me to tears. Seems these days a lot of things bring me to tears but those things more often than not have to do with the human condition, relationships and the consequences of our personal actions.

The movie was “Seven Pounds” starring Will Smith. If you haven’t seen it yet, you should. It is excellent. Sad, touching, heartwarming… many things.

Unfortunately, suicide does not have the impact on others that is depicted in this movie. Ultimately it is a selfish act – leaving behind those who cared about the person wondering what they could have done to prevent the death or wondering why they didn’t see the signs.

Suicide is a major, preventable public health problem. In 2004, it was the eleventh leading cause of death in the U.S., accounting for 32,439 deaths. The overall rate was 10.9 suicide deaths per 100,000 people. An estimated eight to 25 attempted suicides occur per every suicide death.(2)

My husband found out this morning that someone he had come to know and like on an internet chat board killed himself on Friday. Ironically this was the Friday before Father’s Day and he left behind a young son, parents, and other family members. This man was someone that my husband had never met personally but he developed a relationship with him – kindred spirits you might say. They exchanged personal messages and stories, and planned on meeting each other when my husband traveled back to his home state to visit his family – that will never happen now.

I cried again this morning. It is heart wrenching watching the people that you care about struggle. My husband was sobbing as he reviewed the messages between them and the messages on the board from their compadres, looking for a sign, wondering how he could have missed what seemed so obvious now.

The “goodbye” message that was sent to the board on the day of his death…

“I love this place and most of the people here. The ones I’ve had the good fortune to meet in person are really salt of the earth folks. Somebody else is going to have to watch the door for me now. Make sure to keep the riff-raff out”

the last line of a post thanking all of those he had come to know on the board. Signing his screen name and “out”.

I don’t know how he died, and personally I don’t want to. It is sad and the expressions of grief by those who had gotten to know him are being freely expressed on a board of normally “tough” guys. All are expressing the sorrow they are feeling that they will never see another post from him. Expressing the sorrow they are feeling for his family, those he left behind.

A particularly poignant post was this…

“He offered to buy me a beer and talk shop 3 weeks ago when I was in the area fishing. Never took him up on it thinking I’d just meet up with him in a week or two. Time to get back to the basics and what’s important.”

This line leading to my last thought and one that I share on a regular basis – remember to tell people that you love and care about them – do it now and do it often. Don’t Wait! You may not have the opportunity later.

We went to the beach tonight, lit a bonfire and offered a toast to my husbands friend "Outcast" (1974 - 2009). The tide came in and took the fire away, a perfect end to the evening - may he rest in peace.

Sources:

1) The Internet Movie Database

2) National Institute of Mental Health

Fathers Day… I love you dad!

I was sitting in a bar with my brothers… (no this is not a joke) when my middle brother asked me if I knew when his birthday was. I said “yeah, it’s sometime in March, after mom’s birthday” and the discussion continued as follows: Brother (B): well, do you know what date? Me (M): I think the 15th. B: Well how about his birthday – pointing you my oldest brother. M: Late August or maybe September? (I get him confused with my sisters B-day).

My brother rolled his eyes and then proceeded to name each family member and their birthday, to which I replied “I don’t know what good it does to remember everyone’s birthday if you don’t do anything about it!” (He doesn’t!) The discussion ended.

The point being – I am not good with dates or holidays. They come and go and I am none the wiser. Some people remember the anniversary of “so and so’s death” – I have no clue. Heck I hardly remember my own birthday and have to ask my husband every year how old I am.

If it wasn’t for my mom I wouldn’t have known when Father’s Day was this year – but as I mentioned above, what good is it to know if you don’t do anything about it. Here it is Friday, Father’s Day is on Sunday and I didn’t get a card out to my dad.

So, I decided that the best way I could honor my dad was to tell everyone how I feel about him. Here it goes…

He was born a poor black child… no, that was from a movie… with Steve Martin I think…

I love you dad!

I mentioned in my “bio” that I think I have the best parents in the entire WORLD. That is true – and the best family too. With that – I think my dad is phenomenal! I couldn’t have a better dad if I had picked him myself – which we all know isn’t possible. How fortunate was I to have been born his child? Very!

My parents

I don’t really know how to describe him however. He is humble and unassuming. Non-judgmental. Caring. Kind. Patient. Wise! Not only hard working but smart. There is no doubt that he loves all of his children – always!  I learned the meaning of “unconditional love” from my parents.

Growing up the biggest gift he ever gave me was to make me think for myself. He didn’t give advice. He would say “well, what do YOU think that you should do?” and “What’s the worst thing that could happen if you did that?” or “Are there other options that need to be considered?”

That is not to say that he didn’t have an opinion or that he wouldn’t share his view. It is to say that he allowed us to make our own mistakes, held us accountable for the results and loved us regardless of the outcomes.

Even though he worked a lot to support his five children and had more than one job at times in order to do so, I do not remember a time when he was not there for us. Supporting us at a sporting event or cheering us on from a sideline or helping with homework. He was always there.

He also did things that “other dads” didn’t do – at least according to my friends. It was comforting to know that I could depend on both of my parents even when the topic wasn’t in his realm of experience.

I also appreciated that he (actually both of my parents) treated each of us (the children) as individuals – although sometimes it didn’t seem fair. We were disciplined as individuals, praised as individuals and loved as individuals. I remember complaining once that “he get’s to do that, why don’t I? It’s not fair.” and my dad responding “you are not your brother.”  Enough said. I can say that we were all treated fairly and loved equally.  He shows his pride freely and shares his love openly.

We learned a lot from him, and continue to do so. He is a thinker – he can figure out anything and isn’t easily (at least visibly) frustrated when working on an issue. I think that is where I learned the “where there is a will, there is a way”. He is creative and a bit unconventional at times when figuring out how to get things done. When he retired after 40+ years with his company they created a plaque for him with every tool he ever invented/created – commenting that if there wasn’t a tool available to get a job done he would make one.

I love that I have a lot of wonderful and happy memories of my life. Funny one’s too!

• Going to Indiana – seven of us in the station wagon, children ages 3 – 16 and mom and dad.
• Summers at “the lake” with family – the summer living in the tent.
• Mom calling dad to see where my glasses were: I broke them at school and he attempted to fix them. They were in the oven, melted across the rack… fix – not successful.
• Getting my first “adult bike” in my favorite color!
• Coming home late after my first high school date only to be met at the door by my dad in his yellow boxer shorts – my date saying “Hi Mr. C, bye Michelle” and running quickly back to his car.
• Being taught how to maintenance my vehicle – we couldn’t drive until we knew how to take car of our own car.
• Going to the ocean for holidays with the family – go-carts, kites, food – “the hand of wisdom!”
• Preparing to walk down the aisle for my wedding with tears starting to form – saying “I can’t do this” and dad saying “Oh, yes you can!” – it wasn’t the wedding I couldn’t do, it was the crying… I guess he wanted to make sure I got hitched!
• Spending a month on the road with my parents in 2007 – everyone should be able to spend time with their parents.  It was a fabulous month!

There are so many other wonderful things to say, but alas I am out of room.

Most importantly I hope that it is evident how much I love my dad and how much he means to me. Everyone should be as fortunate!

In case I don’t say it enough – I love you dad!

Sick to my stomach…

I just got this email… Please read and if you feel so inclined respond. This is terrible and I am sick to my stomach with how horrible people can be.

No matter what our personal beliefs are this type of behavior cannot be tolerated or allowed to continue.

—–Original Message—–
From: Dana H*** [mailto:dana.h***@******.com]
Sent: Wednesday, June 17, 2009 8:19 PM

Subject: From Dana–Please consider writing the Anchorage Assembly

Dear Friends and Family,

I sent this to a few of you last night, but am resending with more information, and asking a few more of you if you’d be willing to join in on writing the Anchorage Assembly in support of Ordinance 64.

If you aren’t familiar with what’s going on in Anchorage, there is an ordinance in front of the assembly that would add “sexual orientation” to the list of groups protected from discrimination in employment, housing, and loans or credit. There are a few other things that have been discussed, such as restroom availability to those who are transgendered or in transition, but I think these will end up being left out of the ordinance. Basically, what Ordinance 2009-64 is saying is that you can’t be discriminated against due to race, religion, sex, disability, national origin, or sexual orientation.

Those who are opposed to the ordinance are primarily opposed due to their religious objection to homosexuality. Jerry Prevo, pastor of the Anchorage Baptist Temple, sent out the email below, trying to rally additional support from his congregation. If you need any convincing that the opposition to this ordinance is all about not-very-nice-ness, just note the words “perverts,” “diseased,” “deviant,” “scourge,” and so on.

I have attended two meetings of the Assembly, 5 hours a week ago and 5 and a hal hours last night. I’ve listened to over 200 testimonies. The “pro” side, or the “blue shirts,” told their stories of discrimination, of harassment, of violence, and asked that they be afforded the same rights and protection as other people. The “anti” side, or the “red shirts,” say that we blue shirts need to be cured, that we recruit children, that we’re pedophiles, that we promote pornography, that we’re sinners, that we’re in  bondage, that we’re sick, that we’re going to hell, that we’re deviants, that we’re perverse, that we’re no different from necrophiliacs…and on and on and on. It’s pretty horrible to sit there and listen to that. If this ordinance does not pass, it would be like saying that it’s okay to direct that kind of venom toward people who are gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered.

The difference between not having an ordinance in place and voting against an ordinance is saying that it’s acceptable that this kind of discrimination exists and saying that we as a community endorse this kind of discrimination.

Still not convinced discrimination exists? Ask me about one of my students belligerently asking me if I was gay in response to my telling him that his rude comments about a gay artist were inappropriate, and what happened next. Ask me about not putting up a picture of my significant other on my desk at work because that could offend someone. Ask me about coworkers putting crosses and fish in their workspaces or in their email signatures and how I don’t even dare bring in a mug with a rainbow. Ask me about being told by aphysician that my being gay is due to a  chemical imbalance. Ask me how everyone of us in a blue shirt took a huge risk by even showing up to the public hearing.

Prevo had others bused in from other parts of the state, and even other states. They put elementary school-aged children out in front of the library (where the Assembly chamber is) holding signs about gay people going to hell. They took their signs and pushed them in blue shirts’ faces or surrounded blue shirts so that they were trapped in a little bubble of opposition. They took their signs and stuck them or held them in front of ours. Or in front of us.

They were just mean. I still can’t wrap my brain around how this is a Christian way to act. It’s been a while since Sunday school, but I remember love being the big lesson. Apparently that’s not in fashion anymore.

A good source for info on the pro (blue) side—and lots of pictures: http://www.themudflats.net/category/anchorage-assembly/

Jerry Prevo’s site: http://www.sosanchorage.com

The Anchorage Assembly page (with links to the proposed ordinance
versions): http://www.muni.org/assembly2/index.cfm

If you choose to write, here are some tips recommended by some of the experienced members of the blue shirts:
– keep it brief
– make it personal (a lot of the opposition are sending cut-and-paste letters)
– try to tell why this matters, why it’s so important to have this ordinance
– state clearly that you want the Assembly to vote yes on Ordinance 64
– if you are a resident of Anchorage, make that clear; if you are not
a resident of Anchorage, explain your connection (lived in Alaska ___ years, lived in Anchorage for ___ years, care about someone who lives in Anchorage who is going to be affected by this ordinance, etc.)
– you can just use your initials if you’re not comfortable putting your whole name (but if you do that, I think it would be great to explain that you don’t feel safe or whatever) but otherwise put lots of your contact info on there so it’s easier to tell you’re an actual
person.

And here’s the contact info for the Assembly: 632 W. 6th Avenue Suite 250, Anchorage, Alaska 99501 To email all assembly members: WWMAS@ci.anchorage.ak.us (907) 343-4311

Thank you,
- Dana

Please share this with those you feel would be supportive of the ordinance.
__________________________________________________________________

You can read the email sent by Pastor Prevo in my earlier post “How did we get this way?“

As my friend Dana stated “The difference between not having an ordinance in place and voting against an ordinance is saying that it’s acceptable that this kind of discrimination exists and saying that we as a community endorse this kind of discrimination.”

It’s not…

For an excellent account of the actual words being said and a full transcript of the proceedings, please refer to the following blog the Alaska Commons.

If this doesn’t make you ill, it should.

How did we get this way?

I am a bit befuddled these days.  I can’t understand how, as a society, we got so polarized, and so polarized that people are unable to see that there is more than one way of looking at things. In addition to multiple viewpoints, why can’t people see that there may be more than one right answer to a question?

Liberal, conservative…  pro-life, pro-choice… right, wrong…  Ugh, it is so frustrating! Can’t we all just get along? Why do we have to attack, criticize and belittle each other?

I grew up appreciating people for who they are.  I don’t want everyone I know to believe the same things that I believe, or act like cookie cutouts. People are created as individuals and that means that they are different.  Why do we try so hard to make everyone the same and belittle people who hold different beliefs?

Basically, I look at it this way:  Are you a good person? Do you treat people kindly?  Are you considerate? Do you tell the truth?  Are you respectful?

Most of all, I learned how to respect people as they are, even if they are different than me. Silly me, you mean someone can have a different value system from me and I can still choose to like them? How is that possible?

I am not saying that I like everyone – I am saying that I respect them for who they are and their right to believe what they choose.  If I find someone offensive, I don’t associate with them, but I don’t attack them either.

In the end, what I know is that we all have to live with the decisions that we make, we have to reconcile our actions with our “maker”, whomever we may think that is.

Life is too short!

Having said that, I am not very happy because I had an email forwarded to me today that I just don’t understand. There was a news story about an assembly meeting in Anchorage last week and there were all these angry people getting in each other faces.  I didn’t realize at the time what the clip was about because I have gotten into the habit of tuning out a majority of the news. I get tired of the noise of people trying to convince each other that their point of view is the only and correct point of view. Most of the angry people on the news cast who were being loud and disrespectful were wearing “red” shirts. You’ll see the meaning of the color of shirt below.

The email below is from the Pastor of the Anchorage Baptist Temple – the church tag line is… “A Caring Community Church” (Check out their web site! Anchorage Baptist Temple ) – I don’t see anything caring about this email. Please note the language that is used.  I can’t even describe how offended I was reading this.

———- Forwarded message ———-

From: C****** W**** <o**************t@gmail.com>

Date: Tue, Jun 16, 2009 at 3:34 PM

Subject: Stop the Invasion

To: ********@gmail.com

**Please forward this to other righteous citizens of Anchorage.**

Dear ABT Email Family,

FOR THE SAKE OF OUR CHILDREN, GRANDCHILDREN, RELIGIOUS FREEDOM, CHURCHES, CHRISTIAN SCHOOLS, WE MUST STOP THIS NEW ORDINANCE IN ANCHORAGE. HOMOSEXUALITY IS NOT AN ACCEPTABLE MORAL LIFESTYLE. IT IS DISEASED AND DEVIANT. HOMOSEXUALS ARE TRYING TO FORCE US TO APPROVE THEIR LIFESTYLE INSTEAD OF JUST ACCEPTING THEM. HOMOSEXUALS  ARE NOT BEING DEPRIVED OF JOBS, PLACES TO LIVE OR LOANS. THEY HOLD HIGH POLITICAL OFFICES, WELL-PAYING CORPORATE POSITIONS, AND ARE, AS A WHOLE, IN A HIGHER INCOME BRACKET

The liberals on the Anchorage Assembly are trying to pass an ordinance to give “special rights” to gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and of all things transgender perverts. Last week we surprised them with an overwhelming number of people there in opposition, but they do not  believe we can sustain these numbers. They feel like we are a bunch of wimps when it comes to fighting for what is right. To make it even harder, they have scheduled, in addition to the Tuesday night meeting, as to make it even harder,  a special Wednesday night meeting. I am calling off our regular church service Wednesday so we can overwhelm them again on Wednesday night. This is how important this issue is to defeat.

Below is some general information and BE SURE TO WEAR SOMETHING RED. (blue is their color) – Pastor Prevo

General Information: The public testimony concerning the proposed homosexual ordinance continues Tuesday and Wednesday nights. We need everyone to attend the Assembly meeting at the Loussac Library. We need to fill up the Assembly Chambers with people wearing red shirts showing their opposition to the proposed ordinance. If you can arrive by 3 p.m., take a seat in the Assembly Chamber Hall. Bring something to eat or drink and a good book to read. Arriving early is important but coming when you can and being present, even outside, is just as important. We need to show the Assembly Members the voters of Anchorage will not tolerate this scourge.

———————————————————————

I do not know what all is included in the proposed ordinance, but the language in this email turns my stomach. The offensive words used to describe a group of people in general, doesn’t describe the caring people that I know who are homosexual. They are not “diseased” or “deviant” and they are certainly not “perverted”. These words, coming from a pastor of  “A Caring Community Church” appear hypocritical and contrary to Christian teachings. All I am reading is anger, hate and intolerance.

I am choosing to send Pastor Prevo a personal message stating how offended I am at the language that is used in the email.  This does not show any of the Christian principles that I grew up with and if this is the message that he is “sharing”, I do not want anything to do with him or the parishioners at the Anchorage Baptist Temple.

If you feel so inclined, I would ask that you also share your thoughts with him about the message that he is sending. He can be reached at the following address: Anchorage Baptist Temple, 6401 E Northern Lights, Anchorage, AK 99504 or by telephone at 907-333-6535.

Hello World!

Okay… this is my first foray into blogging… what to say, what to say…

I have never had a problem telling people what I think, I just haven’t published my thoughts in a forum such as this.

I like to think that I look at issues from many sides before making a decision about what I believe and then speaking on that topic. There are times when I may not have all of the information and there are times when I have changed my stance on a topic after gaining a viewpoint that I did not have – I am always open to learning.

Take what you want and leave the rest, we are all entitled to our opinions and beliefs… unless of course we no longer live in America.

My preference is that if you have a comment about something I have said that you comment respectfully. I will do the same.